Call for work

The Happy Generations is reading work for Issue 2. Snappy prose on subjects of general interest, please. Deadline is August 1.

"Reporting" is especially encouraged. Jazzed-up or meditative journalism, gonzo, investigative poetics, psychic reporting, mneumonic journalism, mini memoir, criticism (of sex, drugs, rock and roll . . .), essays on subjects that matter, or anything along those lines -- however eccentric -- as long as the prose is snappy.

Please email submissions to eric.gelsinger@gmail.com Thanks.

We also need artwork.


And subscribe if you haven't already for god's sake. I'm going to have to raise the price kinda soon, but for now a year's subscription (6 issues) can still be had for $2-$4, sliding scale. Two to four fucking dollars. Go to the upper right corner and hit the paypal button. Jesus fucking christ.

I have a new webpage

Thanks to Damian (thanks, Damian!) my page on the House Press website has been updated. The page now includes the complete text I Have Come to Strenghten the Currency, a couple reviews, and audio of Gelsinger Vs. Dreams.

Many of the other author pages on the House site have been recently updated as well.

Zine update: 6 copies left

Even I'm surprised. Only six left. First come, first serve.

The Happy Generations, Issue 1

The first issue of The Happy Generations is ready to mail. It's an old fashioned zine edited by yours truly with Lourdes Vera. It includes:

An account of a walking journey from Portland to San Fran

Something I can't mention here

Psychic experiences

A ranging review of Bill Callahan's "Sometimes I wish we were an eagle"

A play-by-play of going around NYC with $15,000 cash

Experiences with doctors

Essays on food and drink

Part I of a screed against documentation

A poetic essay on the human scale

Artwork by Sarah Haras

All columns have content and are written in snappy prose. The cost for one zine is $.50. A subscription for one year costs between $2 and $4. Go to the upper right corner of the blog to order. Or write me.

And now that the first issue is flying about, please send submissions for number two.

Thanks

The Zine Team Publishes New Zine!

Here it is... what everybody has been waiting for... The Happy Generations Zine is now OUT and HOT OFF THE PRESS! Issues are going fast, so subscribe as soon as possible. Get a subscription for yourself. Get a subscription for your best friend. Don't have a best friend? Get a subscription for your dog. Or cat. Mom. Dad. Grandma. Aunt. Cousins. Third cousins five times removed.
Subscription prices are based on a sliding scale: $2 or $4 depending on your level of diginity. This is for all the zines in the whole year. Nobody is getting it for free. I'm not even getting it for free.
Please use the PayPal bar in the upper right corner to pay. You can also just give me or Eric your payment in person.

Thanks!
Lourdes

Hasheem Thabeet: Bust of the 2009 NBA Draft

Here's something else I've just needed to get off my chest for a while. Hasheem Thabeet. This guy is going Bust-O in the NBA. Big time. Lately, the college Junior moved ahead of Ricky Rubio to #2 on many expert draft boards. People are calling him the next Bill Russell? Well what did the next Bill Russell do against Michigan St in the Final Four, in the biggest game of his career:

The 7'3 Thabeet managed seven! that's 7! rebounds. That's less than one rebound per foot! And one box score gives him only 6 boards! The game prior, the elite 8 match up against Missouri, Thabeet had 13 rebounds, but no blocks, and only 5 points!

The lackadaisical and daydreamy Thabeet always lopes around the court like he can't wait to get off his feet and close his sleepy eyes, but fans who thought the bright lights of the Big Game would energize him were disappointed. Quoting the espn recap of the National Semi-final game:

Thabeet led the Huskies with 17 points and six rebounds, but it was the quietest 17 points anyone's ever had. He looked gassed from the opening tipoff, leaning over, tugging on his shorts and gasping for air not even six minutes into the game. Aside from the first few possessions of the second half, he actually looked lost down low.

And here's the most important sign. I would begin and end my scouting here. With only a few minutes to go in the very close contest, Thabeet TOOK HIMSELF OUT OF THE GAME! He took a hard fall on his back, but nothing special. Keeping in mind this is the final four, his face went all distorted like a hungry baby, he clutched at his back like in a commercial for a personal injury attorney; his theatrical performance was so transparent it was clear as day he wasn't really hurt. I was in disbelief (as was his coach!) when he walked himself to the sidelines and motioned he couldn't continue during the most critical part of the game -- and of his entire basketball career. That he was fine was confirmed a couple minutes later when he re-entered the game and showed no signs of even stiffness. But by the time he re-entered, Michigan State had all but won the game. This guy was supposed to be the leader of his team!

Here is a tall kid from Dar Es Salaam who didn't grow up playing basketball, didn't grow up idolizing NBA players, didn't grow up with any big league dreams at all. Who can blame him if he doesn't take the game all that seriously? His work ethic has always been criticized, and on the biggest stage he proved his doubters 100% correct. And mind you it's not like the kid can get by as it is: he is extremely limited in the post, has no jump shot, and is a sub-par rebounder for a guy his size. And now teams want to use a top 3 draft pick on him? No way.

When you're 7'3 in college, you're gonna get some stats, especially playing for a powerhouse team like UCONN. So it's no surprise Thabeet was able to score 21 pts and pulled down 18 boards against UB last year. But what did he do against quality big men? Against DeJuann Blair of Pitt (Blair is considered a mid to late 1st round pick tho I like him much more than Thabeet) he scored . . . 5 points and grabbed 4 rebounds. That's what you can expect from him in the NBA. Also expect the 3 turnovers and 0 assists. Oh, and how was his defense? Blair racked up 22 points and 23 rebounds. (to be fair, Thabeet actually marginally outplayed Blair in a second match-up, but UConn lost both games, and Thabeet's inconsistency speaks volumes).

In another UConn loss, Thabeet put up only 4 pts and 7 boards against Georgetown's own 7-footer Greg Monroe. Monroe, only a freshman, scored 16 points against the next Bill Russell. And btw, I've seen Monroe play live, and I highly doubt he's NBA material either, though he's only a frosh, and seemed to be playing less than 100% healthy, so I'll reserve judgement.

I think Thabeet is a good enough athlete to play in the NBA. He also has a body type that might mean relative longevity for a 7'3 player; though given recent history of centers and injuries, I'd be reluctant to draft anybody taller than 7'0. But the guy didn't grow up playing basketball and has no skills. And he has proven he's not interested in developing skills. Here's a guy who will be happy to get his rookie millions, will get picked up as a back-up center after his rookie contract expires, will play 12 minutes a game, maybe block a shot or two, and that's all she wrote. He'll be happy as a clam.

My real fear is the Knicks will trade David Lee to move up, and draft Thabeet at #3.

Just

Ok about a year and a half ago maybe? I noticed in speech, but especially in on-line writing, an explosive proliferation of the "just just" construction in persuasive writing, where instead of arguing a point, a writer (or speaker) says something just is something.

Don't know why I'm writing this now as opposed to any other time in the past 18 months. I just am. I guess a Jeff Simon article in today's Buffalo News (Jeff Simon: Mean late-night TV jokes just aren't funny) just was the last straw. Or maybe it was the rhetorical finishing touch on a CNN commentary by Roland Martin entitled Enough with Baseball and Steroids. In oratory worthy of Daniel Webster or Demosthenes, Martin's final paragraph verbatim:

Let's just accept this as a fact, acknowledge those were the dark days and move on. It's just tiring to keep going back to what happened then. It's done. It's over. So let it go.

This guy gets paid to write. Anyway, you just can't substitute just for reasoned argument. It's just lazy. It's just typical of just everything that's just plain bad these days because it just is. And that is just that.

The zine's name is The Happy Generations.

The Happy Generations